A leap of faith into a life that doesn't allow us to control all
Four year plans, six year plans, eight year plans. I have been the self-titled queen of over-planning and overthinking. But today, I sit back and try to imagine a “no year” plan. With only some short-term goals and one large overarching long-term goal in my back pocket, let’s walk through this dark tunnel of the unknown with no flashlight, and let’s learn how to love it.
Those few minutes of being drowned in the intense black of darkness feels torturous, standing paralyzed in the middle of what feels like an abyss of absolutely nothing. Walking into the unknown feels incredibly similar, uncertainty crawling up your legs and planting you firmly in your position, not allowing you to think past the three-headed monster that’s
logically going to be eating your face off if you open your eyes. But deep breaths everyone (I tell myself, as I start to feel myself hyperventilate), our bodies are made for this, remember? Our eyes adjust to the dark, and suddenly, we can see a vague pebbled path in front of us, and the safe concrete insides of the tunnel.
Loving the unknown requires us to take an adrenaline-filled leap of faith into a life that doesn’t allow us to control everything around us. Instead, the only power we have is over our individual actions in the present time. There’s no time to plan and dwell over the “What ifs” and “I should haves.” To truly embrace the unknown, we have to trust our judgments and actions, and to take the first step into the tunnel with the faith that whatever happens within these walls doesn’t have to be known to help us grow and learn as young adults. Maybe embracing the words “I don’t know” will reveal who we really are at our cores, and who we want to become in the future.
Walking through the tunnel can feel frustrating, tripping over objects we couldn’t make out in the distance and never knowing where the twists and turns will take you. But embracing the unknown can also unlock some amazing things we never saw in ourselves.
I may not have my trusted four year plan in my back pocket, instead, I have confidence that in midst of a future that no one can predict, I’m living in the present and loving all the uncertainties the world can offer.